Hi
24 years ago today my mom died…….Now some would ask why I remember that day say exactly - I say "How on earth could I ever forget?!!" My mom had been very sick for a very long time and was once again in the hospital. A nurse came out of her room and asked us a stoic question - did we want to use extraordinary measures used to save her life. Of course your heart screams yes! yes! yes!, but the brain kicks in and you know the end is near regardless…she was tired and in pain and my dad and I knew she needed to rest…my dad said no and my stomach churned, but the nurse nodded and said that we had made the right decision. She didn't die right then - but a part of me did… I kissed her forehead and told her I loved her. I studied her eyes to try to forever embed them in my memory and she whispered she loved me too.
I was an only child and the bond I had with my mom was very strong and very deep. Many wondered ( my husband included ) if I would ever get over the trauma - I didn't. I live a life, of course, I smile and laugh and enjoy my family and people probably don't have a clue how much pain I live with everyday. I still tear up for no real reason, but I hide it and go on because well, what is the alternative? So after I write this I will get up and get dressed and go about my day….but, forget - never!
DG
Monday, January 6, 2014
Sunday, January 5, 2014
Hi
Well, here I am… a middle aged woman in the middle of Iowa with family and a home…living an average life…..what on earth do I have so say that could be the least bit interesting? I believe everyone has a story and you just might be surprised. I have kept quiet for years - nodding, smiling, hemming and hawing. I have agreed with people when I really didn't and disagreed when I really should not of. I like peace - conflict and I do not get along….so I wishy and I washy till I am not sure what I stand for.
I think it is time for me to figure this all out…..come along for the ride!!
DG
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